GREATEST HITS
Topic: *BEAUTY's Greatest Hits
"That's the beauty of it" GREATEST HITS (selected posts that made our day, and all ssywak's posts):
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Fri Apr 11 03
I think it's from a lot of things.
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Sat Apr 12 03
Although it's such an obscure place, I'm wondering if the quote hasn't been used more than once. Anyway, it's in the Elvis musical, "Live a Little, Love a Little" (1967). Elvis goes to a swinging party, and the host shows him this arty-looking gadget with flashing lights. Elvis and the host exchange those lines, then the host goes on to say that it's a "conversation piece." Elvis carries it over to this sexy dame who's caught his eye (Celeste Yarnall), and when she asks about it, he breaks into the musical pick-up line, "A Little Less Conversation, A Little More Action," as Celeste coyly smirks and everyone around them does the watusi. This, of course, is the original source of that recent postmortem Top 10 hit. [currently CLOSEST/EARLIEST, which see]
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Sat Apr 13 03
The film you're describing is Toys. It's been a long time since I saw it, but it sounds like it might be the right film.

Of course, the other possibility is that five million years ago, primitive man was visited by aliens who said that constantly. And so, it's worked its way into our collective subconscious, with the result that we all recognise it, even though we haven't heard it anywhere ourselves.
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Mon Apr 14 03
Bwahahahahahahahahaha!
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Tue Apr 15 03
Am firmly of the belief that this quote does not exist. It's moderately funny and captures the imagination. You could dedicate an entire TV episode with that as the title. Congrats to ssywak (P.S. - you suck [coyly smiling smilie])

Having said that it could be from "Kids in the Hall: Brain Candy." One of the pills pitched to the boss of the drug company--maybe.
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Tue Apr 15 03
I believe there is one specific answer that is THE one most of us are thinking of. I'm just not sure what it is.
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Tue Apr 15 03
I think it's Pulp Fiction referring to what's inside the briefcase.
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Wed Apr 16 03
I know I've heard this quote or the same sort of line more than once, I agree it's possibly Monty Python, and the English stuff sound about right, but I've got a nagging feeling I've READ it somewhere to, possibly Discworld.
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Fri Apr 18 03
Sorry maybe this quote has never been said anywhere.
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Sat Apr 19 03
The male brain? Oh, sorry, I thought you meant what is this a description of?! (Couldn't resist.)
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Sun Apr 20 03
In response to people checking scripts--what if the line was ad-libbed?
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Tue Apr 22 03
I AM WITH [deleted] AND [deleted]--THIS HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR ALMOST 2 WEEKS AND SSYWAK HAS NOT SAID A WORD IF U ASK ME I THINK HE/SHE KNOWS THE ANSWER AND ARE JUST SEEING HOW LONG THIS WILL GO ON AFTER A WHILE PEOPLE ARE GOING TO GET BORED IT WAS FUN WHEN IT FIRST STARTED BUT NOW IT IS GETTING BORING EVERYONE WANTS TO KNOW THE ANSWER AND MOVE ON
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Tue Apr 22 03
No, this could be the thread that never ends. It's amusing as well as frustrating.
BTW I've found the query on 3 different message boards, it's becoming a legend I swear.
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Mon Apr 28 03
Ok, so I was wrong, it'd DEFINITELY not an IBM commercial. Hehehe, look at this:

"Jon -- you have certainly piqued our curiosity here. But,
unfortunately, the quote did not come from an IBM ad. Good luck with your search. Sincerely, Judi Tannenbaum

IBM Corporate Marketing
New Orchard Rd
Armonk, NY 10504"

I can't believe I wrote to them. This is most fun.
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Mon Apr 28 03
It was an episode of Seinfeld--or Friends.

Or it was the movie Those Fantastic Men and Their Magical Flying Machine
No it was The Russians are Coming!, The Russians are Coming!

Wait! I'm sure it was Mary Poppins!

I think this thread is too full of "It might be..." The guy who started this thread needs to go all through the list, assign each person here a movie to check out since he wanted to know. "Calculatus Eliminatus" the only way to find out what something is is to find out what it's not.
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Thu May 1 03
[excerpt] ...I don't know what to think anymore.
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Fri May 02 03
[poster whose favorite suggestion was just refuted, subject: "Oh, bite me"]
I'm totally kidding, just also totally frustrated.
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Fri May 02 03
"...It doesn't DO anything, that's the beauty of it." MY theory:
It was somehow subliminally tapping into our subconscious every time a commercial appeared on TV, getting us to buy their products. No wonder why I always seem to fall for those useless infommercials!
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Mon May 05 03
Let this be the last post. It is from many things and is not an exact quote. Here Layeth the end!
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Mon May 05 03
Actually here layeth the end!
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Fri May 09 03
[Quotes ssywak]
"This phrase did not enter the public's superconscious until I posted this question here. But, since the superconscious is not temporally bound, we all now remember the phrase as if we have always known it. Something about Jungian archetypes, I think."

You are exactly right. Sometimes a work of art taps into a previously unstated but already existing awareness in humanity as a whole. Other times, the awareness exists but nobody expresses it. You detected it and expressed it, and had you done so in a film, a painting, or a poem you would have been honored for capturing the thoughts and feelings of an entire generation. So although the phrase "It doesn't DO anything. That's the beauty of it." will now become part of mankind's intellectual heritage, because you posted it as a question on this board, you--alas--will only be remembered and honored by us few here.
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Wed May 28 03
I just had a thought. Maybe this is actually going to become a new religion! The purpose of life in our religion is to find the source of this quote (Remember it doesn't exist in reality. You must find the source in spirit.) This is the bible, and ssywak is the messiah, unknowingly of course. He will be crucified by the unbelievers who've gone months without sleep unwittingly racking their brains to find the answer to the question. It's the question that drives us. God is the spiritual being, he who speaketh the quote. Much like god he is not a real person, but a holy being who bespoke this quote into the subconsciouses of the unknowing few.
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Wed May 28 03
YEAH. RIGHT!
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Wed Jun 11 03
It just goes on and on like Friends
Some people started answering not knowing what it was
And they'll continue answering forever just because
This is the thread that never ends
It just goes on and on like Friends
Some people started answering not knowing what it was
And they'll continue answering forever just because
This is the thread that never ends...
[on and on for many verses]
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Wed Jun 11 03
All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it. All work and no play and that's the beauty of it.
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Tue Jun 14 03
[A NM post of this date is subject-ed "I hear the voice of Jerry Lewis...." It is not clear whether this means they suggest it is a line from a Jerry Lewis movie, or they are having an epiphany.]
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Mon Aug 18 03
greatest. thread. ever.
(although I'm less than halfway through it.)
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Thu Oct 23 03
Hi!
----S P O I L E R S----
I believe the quote is from the movie, "Remo Williams: The Adventure Begins." This movie stared Fred Ward as the titled character. He was a NY average joe cop. A secret organization forcibly recruited him by 'killing' joe cop and giving him plastic surgery and a new name derived from a bed pan.

The operative that did it to him comes upon a large piece of machinery in a guarded warehouse. But as he and Remo look at it, it starts to disintegrate before their eyes. It was supposed to be a new defense system for the U.S., but the builder only built it to get the money. It was never supposed to work. I think when Remo or someone asks what it does, the head of the organization, played by Wilford Brimley says, "It doesn't DO anything. That's the beauty of it."

This is the movie that has Joel Grey play a Korean teacher who walks on water. He stops Remo from eating hamburgers and shows him how to walk on sticks. There is also a scene where 2 Doberman dogs are chasing Remo. Remo goes high and walks a tightrope to get away from the dogs. One of the dogs ALSO walks the tightrope. Kate Mulgrew is also in the movie.

Now, I'm not positive but I think that's where I heard the quote before. Hope this clears everything up for you--and everybody else.
[I just like this synopsis, and wish more of them on the IMDb pages were like it.]
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Sat Nov 01 03
500 replies and 7 months later-- we still don't know what we're talking about--we don't know if its a real quote, we dont know what kind of movie it might be from--its a bell ringing with a clapper wrapped in wool--it might ring a bell, if any details could be recalled, but hasn't--it's like a ufo experience--everybody thinks they've heard it somewhere, some even think they know exactly, but cant bring it out--

well, if you haven't caught on by now, sorry--it's an alien attack!!! THEY'RE HERE!! THEY'RE HERE!! WATCH OUT!! YOU'RE NEXT! DON'T GO TO SLEEP, THAT'S WHEN IT HAPPENS!! FIRST, IT'S MOVIE TITLES, THEN IT'S YOUR ZIP CODE, YOUR GIRL'S BIRTHDAY, YOUR DOG'S DISTEMPER SHOT APPOINTMENT, YOUR LOOSE CHANGE--SIGNING YOUR TAX RETURN!! DON'T GO TO SLEEEEEEEEEEEEE..
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Mon Jan 19 04
For anyone still trying to figure this out:

I believe this quote is the equivalent of a Rorshach test. It is a perfectly generic throwaway comedy line, with a rhythm that can be found in just about every comedy--whether it be in film, television, commercials, or books. This is why it is so easy to project it onto whoever or whatever you happen to be thinking of.
This would explain the incredibly wide range of responses covering the entire spectrum of entertainment, none of which have any proof to back them up. If it really was a line that was in "lots of movies," then someone would have proven that it's in at least ONE movie, don't you think? The fact is that SIMILAR lines exist.

Now that the line has infected the internet, it will no doubt turn up in an actual movie verbatim, but the real place it belongs is in a psychology text book. Pretty cool actually.
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Fri Feb 13 04
I've heard it on a TV show--but I do recognize it from a movie. This is KILLING ME!!!! AHHHHH!!!!!!! *runs from room, only to realize she left her pop. Then comes slinking back*
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Wed Mar 17 04
Well thank you all sooo much.

Here I am trying to kill some time while I wait for a download to finish. And know I along with half the Internet, by the look of it, am hell bent on finding the answer.

Never has one answer been on the tips of so many tongues at one time. And on behalf of that answer Ewww.

Of course you search the `net for the quote and just get other threads in other forums discussing the exact same topic.

We will never find the answer, I suspect.
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Wed Apr 07 04
I go away for almost a year, and when I come back this thread is STILL around, like something stuck to my shoe that I can't scrape off.
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Thu Apr 08 04
You'll have to speak up. I'm wearing a towel.
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Thu Apr 08 04
I seem to remember the phrase "It doesn't DO anything. That's the beauty of it." It comes from a message posting site called "I Need to Know," that was popular back in the early 21st century. This board was at a "website" called "IMDB" which most historians have surmised is an acronym for "I Married David Bowie," perhaps in reference to the model Iman, who had lots of time on her hands.
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MONDAY APRIL 12, 2004
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday dear IMdb.com post
Happy Birthday to you
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Mon Apr 12 04
Isn't it from a Bill Gates interview when asked about Windows????
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Tue Apr 27 04
What about Monty Python - The Meaning of Life. In the hospital, with the machine that says "bing"?

Woman: "What does it do?"
Doctor: "It doesn't DO anything. That's the beauty of it."
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Thu May 06 04
Well, I went to the next source I could think of for this quote.

Anyone here ever watch "Beat the Geeks"? Ya, I emailed the 'Movie Geek.' That's right. That's just how curious I am as to what the answer is to this puzzling question.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed here.
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Fri May 07 04
That Movie Geek was a weenis. Any one of us should be better equipped than him to answer this.

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Sun May 09 04
I have packed my backpack, filled my water bottles and grabbed my walking stick. I will go in search of this great line. I have contacted the FBI, CIA and Leonard Nemoy, who will have a special airing of this matter on his program In Search of. All the wanted posters are in place as is the reward.

Cheers, wish me luck. I will be back with the answer and the proof!

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Sun May 09 04
Good luck, [deleted]. ;). Actually, that would make a really fun documentary, methinks.
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Mon May 10 04
I agree--would be worth a watching--could be done really well and funny.
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Mon May 10 04
Yeah--no kidding. I wish I really did have the ability to do so. Oh well, just finding the answer will win the glorious praise from all of you!
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Mon May 10 04
Actually, thinking about it more now, it would be a boring documentary. What would be shot the whole time? A guy watching movies, looking through books, and scripts online? I think it would make a much better book, though.
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Wed May 12 04
FYI: The 'Movie Geek' from "Beat the Geeks" emailed me back. He thought it was the drinking bird thing in the Simpsons. Apparently he read that somewhere.

My recollection of it is that Homer doesn't ask what it does, he merely exclaims:
"Oh my God! It's drinking the water!"
To which his brother replies: "Homer, it's just an example."
"This is the greatest invention ever! Look! It's taking another drink!"

Anyway, I'm now considering making a webpage just to post scripts for all of the movies noted as 'possible', just so people can check for themselves [this is not me]. It would probably include "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" and that damn Simpsons episode.

Where will it end?!
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Thu May 13 04
Has anyone noticed how BORING it is to read a book NOT for entertainment purposes, but to find a SINGLE LINE OF DIALOGUE??? I LOVE the Hitchhiker's Trilogy, have read it for fun several times, but plodding through it now, for the simple reason of looking for some very specific text, is BORING! I'm like 2 chapters in. I'll keep you posted.
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Fri May 14 04
This thread is becoming like religion. It's all a matter of faith. The Simpsonites believe it is from the show with Homer's brother, and cannot be moved from that belief. The Hitchhiker people swear it is from that show/book, and they also cannot be moved. The rest just float around giving suggestions that cannot be proved or disproved depending on your belief. I am firm believer in Jimmy James from News Radio as having spoken it, but I can't prove it so I guess that make me an agnostic on the subject. Maybe there is no answer and that is the beauty of it.
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Fri Jul 02 04
What the hell--I just printed this entire thread in flat format so every post shows up. Can you believe it was only 247 pages set on landscape setting? Yeah me neither--work printer is really fast--this took less than 10 minutes!

So now the quest begins--read `em all and make a list of movies guessed--maybe. Anyways I will be doing some reading real soon.

Wish me luck and I am sure I will want to slap some people who posted on here real soon.
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Mon Aug 09 04
JEEZ LOUISE--it took 20 minutes to load this thread. What was the question again?

Oh yeah, you didn't have the complete quote. It's actually: 'It doesn't DO anything but hum the Canadian national anthem. That's the beauty of it'

Hope that helps.
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Tue Aug 10 04
This is one of the most entertaining threads I've ever run across! I actually clicked on it by accident, but when I read the original post my first thought was "I've heard that before! But where?" Imagine my disappointment when, 744 posts later, there was still no answer! So apparently I've just joined the club with dozens of people who've heard it and can't place it. It's absolutely amazing. So thank you everyone for ruining my life! This is so annoying!

Now then, where have I heard that dialogue--
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Thu Aug 12 04
Ah, here it is--this is taken directly from the movie Exit wounds: Two brain surgeons are examining Steven Seagal's brain while digging out a stray bullet, or a bottlecap, hard to tell.
First doctor- (surprised by the small size of Seagal's brain) "It's very cute, but what does it DO?"
Second doctor- "It doesn't DO anything. That's the beauty of it."

Mystery solved, case closed--nothing more to see here--now move along people, move along.
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Thu Aug 12 04
I don't think we all know it from EXIT WOUNDS because I know that I've never watched a Steven Segal movie for more than 5 seconds. It's possible it's in the movie THE CUBE but I wouldn't know which part. They're mostly trying to get out, aren't they?
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Tue Aug 24 04
Just finished watching Koyaanisqatsi for the seventh time, and I conclude that 'It doesn't DO anything. That's the beauty of it' does not appear anywhere in the movie. However, I now suspect that one of those people in the slow motion street scene mouths the words 'It doesn't DO anything. That's the beauty of it' but can't be sure until the lip reader gets here. Will advise.
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Wed Aug 25 04
Hi guys, I just left the "does anybody know the value of pi" thread and dropped in on this one. What's everyone talking about?
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Sat Aug 28 04
After much thought and careful research, I have decided that this quote actually springs from the 8th circle of Hell. It is a conniving demon in the form of a thought, a brain-invading gremlin that spreads like the flu and drives loony everyone with which it comes into contact. I therefore believe we should stop looking to movies for the answer, and instead look to the Yellow Pages for a good exorcist.

Anybody know of a way to convert holy water into HTML?
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Sat Aug 28 04
[subject: ANY CONCLUSIONS THEN?]
I really can't be arsed to read this entire thread (I have contributed though - I thought it might be from "ET" but I really can't be arsed to watch the whole bloody film to find out) - are there any solid contendors for the quote then?

PS: I can't be arsed to do anything.
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Sat Aug 28 04
[by ME]
Yes, conclusions, data and condensation of the thread at my website. Just updated THIS MORNING, for you. But we don't need thinkers anymore, just workers.

kcor1953
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Sun Sep 05 04
definatly 'Friends'. can totally hear chandler saying that. not sure what about though

BTW, what a huge f**king thread! took ages to load
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Sun Sep 19 04
This is driving me CRAZY!!!!
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Sun Sep 12 04
It is from the simpsons episode where Homer's half brother is explaining his invention of the drinking bird, to which Homer asks "but what does it do."
thank you and goodnight.
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Mon Sep 20 04
The drinking bird episode has been ruled out like a million times!
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Wed Sep 22 04
It's the Simpsons I tell you!!
I've got an expert working on it so we should know which episode...
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Sun Oct 03 04
Thanks for keeping the thread alive. I haven't been updating the website I established to list the titles, but I will. Hmmm--Simpsons experts? How's the donuts holding out?

kcor1953
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Sun Oct 03 04
i vowed never to add to this thread again...

but here we go...

why is it so hard for us to admit that this is not an actual quote? why is it so hard for us to let this go? this has turned into "waiting for godot" here. this clearly isn't a real quote, but rather an example of how extraordinary the human mind is. we think we remember something exactly, but we are quite wrong. example: hundreds of responses back, people were certain this quote was from "willy wonka" then "the hudsucker proxy" then "futurama" and now "the simpsons." doesn't the fact that so many people have come up with so many possibilities that they are so sure of and yet so wrong say something??

this quote stems from an old belief/truth. something is beautiful only when it serves no purpose. this theme was explored in "blow-up" in a similar quote, when the main character buys an old plane propeller to put in his art studio. someone asks why, and he says, "because it's beautiful" or something to that effect. if you turn the commentary on, the speaker futher elaborates on this idea. it's probably a theme that has been playing upon countless times, and this is where this quote came from. not from one specific film but from every film.

that being said, has anyone thought of, "the nightmare before christmas"?

kidding!!
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Tue Oct 05 04
While watching a WWII documentary on The History Channel, they had a piece of film with a German general assuaging Hitler's concerns about the French army. It went something like:
Hitler--Was tut es?
General Runstedt--Es TUT nichts. Es ist die Sch?nheit davon, mein Fuhrer!!

I predict this will be the LAST post in this thread.....I'd stake my life on it.
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Tue Oct 05 04
open or closed casket?
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Wed Oct 06 04
My bet is that this entire thing is the thread starter's college thesis...
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Wed Oct 27 04
https://www.angelfire.com/poetry/megswain
I assume one of you did this. I had an important assignment. Then I stumbled on this. I blame you ALL if I fail my exams now.
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Tue Nov 09 04
That was me.
Sorry.
*hides*
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Thu Nov 11 04
Blimely just realized this thread started in 2003!!!!
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Thu Nov 11 04
KILL THIS THREAD!!!!!!!!!!
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Tue Nov 16 04
No.
Mwu Ha Ha Ha! <-----Evil laugh.
-Steve
[ssywak's #18 reply]
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Wed Dec 01 04
It's toward the end of "Birth of a Nation". When the KKK are burning a cross on somebody's lawn. One clan member asks another about why they burn crosses. At least that's what the title card says. I could be wrong?
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Wed Dec 08 04
The quote is said by Morgan Freeman in Bruce Almighty. It's when he lectures Bruce.
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Wed Dec 08 04
Oops I forgot to close the brackets in the last post!!
" ) "
That's better I can sleep easier tonight now!!
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Fri Dec 10 04
The trouble is that this thread actually started more than a month before Bruce Almighty opened! (04/10/03 vs. 05/23/03)
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Fri Dec 10 04
Actually it isn't said in Bruce Almighty...what you are thinking of is:
GOD: The only thing you can't do is mess with free will
BRUCE: Can I ask why?
GOD: Yes you can, that's the beauty of it
Close but not quite it!
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Mon Dec 20 04
i dont know why, but when i read it i immeadiatly thought of galaxy quest, or some other form of tim allen
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Mon Dec 20 04
I think one form of Tim Allen is sufficient, thank you.
kcor1953
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Wed Dec 22 04
This line comes from a movie that has yet to be written by a collective of posters from IMDb.com, the famous website where movie lovers discuss film. In the future, this group writes a film where thousands of posters contribute one line each to form a script of incomparable convolution, then send one of themselves back in time to start this thread to insure the production of the film in the future. So let's get together, write this movie, and do all of our future selves a great favor.
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Fri Feb 18 2005
I just finished the entire works of Douglas Adams (Hitch Hiker's Guide To The Galaxy) ... this quote is not in there. I have never known the entire story so I thought this was as good a time to read it as any ... and you will all be happy to know that it was this thread the prompted me to read it.
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Fri Feb 18 2005
Damn! I just stumbled across this thread an hour ago, and I've almost gone crazy. I KNOW THIS! I DO! It's some annoyed, frustrated person who says the line- perhaps some wacky scientist??? Or maybe from the Simpsons. Well, my life's over. I'm never going to be able to concentrate in school again, and I'll lose all my friends. DAMN YOU ALL!

--Emily--
Beady eyes is right, we're needed!
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Tue Feb 22 2005
I still think it might be from Third Rock from the Sun.

Mary: But what does it do?

Dick: It doesn't do anything that's the beauty of it.

*audience laughs*
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Sat Mar 19 2005
dear L0rd is this still going on??
I thought we got the answer about umm..a year ago? This thread is coming up for it's 2nd birthday is that what's going on? You all just want to party dont you..?[

Seriously. The right answer is in here. I SAW IT. [smiley icon] BELIEVE
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Sat Apr 9 2005
Why not shoot another movie with that quote in it again?

What does it do? Well, we then know for sure at least one answer to the puzzling question.

In addition, the copyright holder of the original quote should sue, for infringement, the distributors of the new film.
And that's the beauty of it, because then we know where the original quote comes from for sure. At last!
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Tue Apr 5 2005
I don't know... I just wanted to be the 1000th reply in this legendary thread.
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Sat Apr 9 2005
Congratulations! It's been exactly two years since this post was created and still no one has come up with a feasible answer! This is downright amazing!

I think this quote, NO I know this quote does not exist! Maybe the first part appears in some movie or show and the second part in another, but they do not appear together! End of story!

Please, everyone just drop this subject and move on!

Wait, what am I saying? I need to know this answer! Someone please help! I have not left my computer since when I first came across this post. HONEST!

So can someone explain what has been happening over the past few years?

Does anyone know the answer? I'll let my fiancee do you if you know the answer! That's how dedicated I am!

So, for the love of god, someone answer!


Happy 2 year anniversary, you DEMONIC post!
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Sun Apr 17 2005
I think it was Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Charlie's grandfather asks what one of Willy Wonka's gadgets does, he says It doesn't do anything thats the beauty of it."
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Sun Apr 17 2005
NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!NO! NO! NO!

My kids watch that movie over and over. It's not the line.

He says, "What does it do? Want to see?"

If any one else post Willy Wonka I will trace their IP address, show up at their door and flay them to an inch of their lives.

Any Questions....
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Mon May 2 2005
I think i might have heard Morgan Freeman say it in one of his movies but I'm not positive.
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Mon May 2 2005
Thanks.

That's so very helpful.
[ssywak?s #27 reply]
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Tue May 3 2005
He spoke!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Tue May 3 2005
I will not get sucked into this one again, I will not get sucked into this one again, I will not get sucked into this one again.

Thanks just had to get that off my chest.
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ssywak's GREATEST HITS
The Venerable ssywak's first post is, of course, The OP. But here are his subsequent posts. (In the New Testament, they would be printed in red letters.)
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#2 post

Wed Apr 16 03
I'm here. This is not a scam. I've just been very busy (sorry)

But--no definitive answer, yet. That sucks!

I appreciate everyone's wracking their brains on this, and I wish it was a quiz, and I could say, "The correct answer is..." but I can't. I just don't know.

-Steve (not Daveq-1)

PS-It's not "Real Genius." I just re-watched that, and the quote's not there (it should be, but it isn't--not even in the bar scene near the end where they're all sitting around just about to realize their mistake).
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#3 post
So...Formula 51, or one of those IBM commercials.

I hereby relieve all of you of duties to this thread. You're free to go.

But, of course, I still have to verify these two responses--

SSYWAK

PS-Oh, SH*&^, I just read that Formula 51 was debunked. Also: Real Genius (not there).
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#4 post
Thu May 08 03
The Australian Egg movie is (I think) "Mr. Accident," with Yahoo Serious (I'm not kidding).

But I don't know if that is the answer to the puzzle--I haven't seen the movie. I guess I owe it to everyone here to sit through it this weekend--where's my Blockbuster coupons?

-Steve

PS. This phrase did not enter the public's superconscious until I posted this question here. But, since the superconscious is not temporally bound, we all now remember the phrase as if we have always known it. Something about Jungian archetypes, I think.
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#5 post
Tue Aug 05 03
I'm here. I'm watching; I'm waiting for an answer. I'm looking at every movie I own (and some I don't), though obviously not as quickly as everyone would like.

Nothing yet.

I was also hoping that this thread would just DIE!, but apparently, it either won't--or can't.

I also hope that no one assumed I took "credit" for the original query. I'm just a carrier, passing along this particular word-virus. Enjoy!

-Steve
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# 6 post
Thu Aug 14 04
Maybe it's not a film-maybe its a book we've all read!

I'll assume that everyone here has read "Galactic Pot Healer" by Philip K. Dick....? No?

I'm just kidding, anyhow.

Also: apologies to all who have half-wasted their lives researching this quote.

Now: KEEP LOOKING!

--Steve
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#7 post
Wed Jan 14 04
I must apologize to everyone here.

Not because I really know the source of the quote--because I don't.

I must apologize for starting you all on such a painful journey. I'm sooooo sorry. I can only imagine how much this search has cost our Gross Domestic Product! Can you imagine how much better our economic recovery would have been if everyone hadn't been trying to figure out this quote?!?

I hereby release you all! Go home! Go back to your families and the warmth of your hearths and homes! Go back to your places of work and be productive once more! Be gone!

Stop thinking about the quote. There never was any quote. This was all a bad, bad dream--

-Steve 1/14/04

But, is this really it? http://forums.afterdawn.com/thread_view.cfm/55229. Is it really a Hitchhiker's guide quote? There seems to be direct supporting evidence--I shall have to check it out this weekend.
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Fri Feb 02 04
#8 post
I agree, charmedlauren [poster who reported "NO Watched" to HHGG TV show]--I couldn't find the quote in there, either.

But I have heard a rumour that someone is making a Hollywood version of HGTTG. Maybe we could all petition them to include the phrase?

--Steve
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Post #9
Fri Mar 12 04
In less than one month, this question will have been plaguing us for ONE WHOLE YEAR.

It has to stop. Now. I want you all to put down your keyboards, and step away from the computer--

It's "Brenda Starr." Really, it is!

No, it isn't. I'm sorry. I just want it all to stop. Please, make it stop. I've done a very, very bad thing by even asking this question. Apparently, Dante predicted this would happen. I've re-read the Inferno, and he has actually assigned a ring of hell for anyone asking the question, "Where does this quote come from: 'It doesn't do anything!'?"

And it's not going to be a matter of me recognizing anything. This search has been around for so long that I can no longer remember the days of innocence, when I thought I recognized the quote for its own sake. Now all I know is the search for the source of the quote. The beauty of the original quote is now lost to me, forever.

Unless, of course, someone here knows where it came from--

-Steve
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# 10 post
Mon Mar 15 04
Thunderrollerss,

Let's hope that your buddies from "Scene It" become obsessed with it, and report back to you, so you can let us all know!

Personally, I'm starting to wonder if it isn't really the "Wizard of ID" cartoon as the source...but how in hell would one check that!

--Steve
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Post #11
Wed Mar 17 04
This is apparently one of the first documented human/meme viruses to be released successfully on the Internet.

I wish I could say that I'm really just doing a sociology study, and that you've all been my experiment, but no such luck. I'm really looking for the source of the quote, after all.

-Steve
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#12 post
Apr 22 04
Sorry, fellow travellers, but I still DON'T think that it's "Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy."

I just went through the series a second time (actually enjoyed it more this time around), and went through all the extra-likely spots an extra couple of times.

No luck. No quote.

If anyone wants to tell me I'm wrong, I would be eternally grateful. But please, tell me the scene, the characters in the scene, etc., etc. If not, I'm just going to have to chalk it up to someone's corrupted memory circuits, again.

And I was so looking forward to thanking everyone, and sending you all home with congratulations for a job well done.

--Steve
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Post #13
Sun Apr 25 04
I appreciate the help, guys, but you're not really helping.

NO MORE GUESSING!

We've been through all these guesses a thousand times (yes--I've counted).

If you know (and I really mean "KNOW") then please post title, scene, characters, and surrounding events.

And I know that it's not "Dude, Where's Your Car." I had the unique mispleasure of actually watching 5 minutes of that dreck-fest on FOX late one night. I'd rather chew on my own forehead than watch that hunk of garbage.
[immediately followed by a post: "One of my friends suggested The Honeymooners."]
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Post #14
Thu Apr 27 04
[ re: Apr 25 post about Monty Python's The Meaning of Life] What about it? Is it there? Is it not? Do you know?

I'll check it out, though, just 'cause I'm that sort of guy. (viz. one with no life)
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Post #15
Mon May 17 04
I'm going to Hell!

Look at all the human lives I've--wasted.

I want to thank you people again for all your efforts.

Now, get back to work: FIND THAT MOVIE!
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Post #16
Wed Jun 30 04
Inner Space? Ernest Goes to Jail? Maybe it's in Zardoz.

(I actually have the last two, and I'm just kidding about Zardoz. I'll look in Earnest ;)

--Steve
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Post #17
Wed Nov 10 04
I watched Galaxy Quest recently, and it's almost from the scene with the big steel "Chompers,"

but it's not.

I keep thinking it's from a "Wizard of Id" cartoon (as in "funny papers" cartoon).

I'll be prowling the Barnes & Nobles this Christmas, stealing glances in the compilation books.

Thanks, everybody, for all the good work! Have a happy Thanksgiving! And don't forget to ask all your relatives about it.
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Post #18
Tue Nov 16 04
[See "Greatest Hits" general]
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Post #19
Thu Mar 3 2005
[In answer to another ?It?s definitely The Simpsons? post]

Been there, done that; and then been there, done that again.

Please follow these steps:

1) Watch the episode you think it's in.

2) Come back to the forum with your tail tucked between your legs, and post something along the lines of, "Yeah; you're right--that wasn't it," or, "It was almost like it, but not really; but I can see how I made that mistake!"

These are acceptable responses, and you will not lose face.
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Post #20
Thu Mar 3 2005
[In answer to a query whether he originated The Question, and if it started here.]

I came across an earlier post on www.hatrack.com (a fansite put up by the author Orson Scott Card), which lead me to post the question here. There was just a discussion on a similarly named thread re. which one pre-dated the other.

I'm not the first. But, apparently, I am the worst.
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Post #21
Thu Mar 17 2005
[A poster cites a specific episode of TV?s Alf.]

I can see a trip to Blockbuster in my immediate future...

You seem awfully confident in your response. Can you offer any additional confirming proof? Surrounding dialogue, for instance. Also, have you reviewed that episode to confirm the quote?

If all this works out, you may just be..."the man."

--Steve
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Post #22
Thu Mar 17 2005
[Another poster suggests Willie Wonka.]

Read the FAQ, dude!

No more "guesses." Or "gusses."

Both your guesses have already been disproven.

I'm not sure if you understand what's going on here now.

This is serious stuff. No more playing around. Two people who posted here within the past three years have already been taken into protective custody by their local state mental institutions.

Please, if you are going to join us in our sacred search, you really need to has what it takes.

Do you has what it takes?

Do you?

Things you will need: a bag of orange slices. $5.
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Post #23
Sun Mar 20 2005
[Alf poster admits the detailed Alf citation was sarcasm.]

Where's that damn "grumble" emoticon...?
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Post #24
Mon Mar 21 2005
[EllenRipley112 provides a hot link to her INTK Board thread listing debunked suggestions.]

Thank you, Ellen,

I've marked it for quick access!
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Post #25
Mon Mar 21 2005
[Another poster wonders if ssywak thought this up himself.]

No, I didn't think of it; I'm just the carrier of a devastatingly powerful viral meme.

Now you've got it, too.
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Post #26
Wed Apr 6 2005
[A poster flames another poster who had suggested Wonka, and in the second poster?s sig is an anagram which the sig terms an allegory (sic). A third poster admonishes the second poster against flaming and points out that--er--an anagram is an anagram. ssywak tells the second poster:]

Calm down, dude. It is "anagram", BTW.

I keep wondering if those "Deleted by the poster" postrs really did contain the answer, and some conspiratorial group with higher powers is keeping the knowledge from us...can anyone say "National Treasure II"?
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Post #27
Mon May 2 2005
[See ?Greatest Hits? general]
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Post #28
Tue May 3 2005
[In response to ?Sphear, the movie with Sharon Stone.?]

I'm sorry, but NO WAY IN HELL!

First off: It's spelled "Sphere,"

Secondly: "Sphere," both as a film, and as a book, MAXXOR SUX, or whatever it is you kids say these days,

And Thirdly: It's not there. And even if it was--SHAME ON YOU for even remotely hinting at the distant possibility that someone should go and watch that horrible film just to check up on you. Personally, I'm embarassed to even be posting on the same board as you. But this had to be said.
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